Should We Swing?

Trying to give some input to prospective first time swingers is always quite difficult because all relationships are so radically different and unique. Swinging and enjoying its benefits within a relationship, is not a science but more of a gentle art that evolves over time and is a very personal and individual experience that's different for everyone.

Having said this, a number of common threads tie the swinging community together and the old saying "couples who play together, stay together" still has a lot of relevance. However there's a lot more to it than this and it's possibly best described through some quotes from swinging friends we've heard over the years that give a little insight into how people perceive swinging and its place within their relationships.

"Walking into a swingers club we feel so incredibly close as a couple - we know whatever happens in there, it will be us two leaving together afterwards, still in love and knowing that once again we got to take home the hottest date in the club".

"My husband is so sexy it would be simply selfish to keep him all to myself".

"My wife looks wonderful when she's having sex and I can see her better when its not me who's having sex with her".

"We love the fact that we can be so open and not have any no go areas or dark shadows in our relationship - those are the places problems can hide and grow big enough to threaten even genuine love".

"I can't possibly keep up with her needs, I'm grateful for some help!".

"Monogamy is a wholly unnatural state that was promoted in society primarily to curb some of the more anti social male tendencies".

"I'm just one man, it would be crazy to think I could be everything to her".

"Keeping a bird in a cage is easy but you only truly know its yours when you open the cage and it still always comes home after flying free".

"I love fish and chips, but wouldn't have it every night!".

"My husband gives such wonderful oral sex, I wish women who say they don't like it could give him a try".

"You wouldn't object if your wife wanted to play netball with someone other than you, so why is sex any different?".

And perhaps a little more radically (and tongue in cheek)..."Monogamy is a disease that is contracted by most people at some stage in their lives but if left untreated for prolonged periods can be fatal to both sexual health and relationships".

A wide range of thoughts, but generally most couples who invite other people into their sex lives experience the feeling of ultimate trust and closeness. For most swinging couples it is also something special to look forward to, a much anticipated meet, a return to a favourite club or a nice weekend away to enjoy friends who you just happen to also sleep with. It is genuine quality "us time", a very close shared interest and also usually a fun and naughty secret (what would my sister/mother/colleagues say?!). Many couples also believe that being able to accept and support a loved one's sexual needs by allowing and sharing additional partners is the ultimate health check for a relationship.

Swinging certainly isn't for everyone, that is totally clear, but if you have the desire to have sex with people other than your own long term partner, even the conversation, thought and discussion about the possibility of swinging will promote a strong sense of openness and honesty within a relationship. Even if you decide its a no thanks or swinging simply remains an exciting part of your shared sexual fantasy world, the journey will be beneficial to most relationships.

If after that you think you might want to dip your toes into the water, take a look at the Adult Match Maker Sydney members currently seeking partners - we've been with this site for a number of years and have made many long term friends through it.

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